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Friday, April 23rd, 2004

Time Event
Picnic yesterday in the garden with Paul. Was sunny up until then, and was sunny again afterwards, but it was still a nice picnic even if a little cooler than we'd expected. And he brought lovely things to eat and a gorgeous bunch of flowers, as well as a small pile of boring post from the office. Definitely a pleasant way to have lunch. Didn't feel like going out in the evening so read lots while rjk was working.

Today I've been sitting in the garden again in the sun. Until I got too hot and started feeling too self-conscious about sitting around in my underwear. I finished my book though. Should write it up but can't be bothered just now. Still no sign of a plumber. I'm not admitting to the next one I call that I'm in for the rest of the week, I want a specific appointment.
Last week I made a list of all the things that were making me feel bad about myself. It came to 3 sides of A4 (in large handwriting) and had wibbles within the subcategories of Work, Studying, Driving, Money, Weight, Relationships, Around the house, Socially and Disorganisation. Today I typed it up, and added to a couple of bits of it. I think in some ways it should help, and that it might be useful when talking to the psychiatrist at Addies (if I ever get another appt) but having done it I'm not feeling terribly perky.

I can't think of nearly as many things which make me feel good about myself. The hair makes me smile when I look in the mirror. Richard is lovely, and I have lots of good friends. I've been enjoying all the books I've been reading. I have a nice family, and Richard's family are lovely too. And the weather is wonderful. It's a longer list than I thought once I put my mind to it.

I think I'm going to go sit in the garden again for a bit.
Just to say...
Thanks guys.

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