February 13th, 2003


daily whine

*sigh* I could just leave it at that really.

Not coping well at the moment with feelings of jealousy, despite there being no real reason to feel them. Can't work out whether occasional feelings of irritation at things people are saying are based on that or if I'd be irritated anyway. Bit of both I think. Feel like I'm not allowed to be cross about things almost, and don't feel I can talk about stuff properly here or anywhere. Not working well, not hungry, tired, weepy, and my own scales seem to think I'll probably stay the same or put on more weight this evening despite being good all week.

Just want to go hide under the duvet and not come out again until everything feels better, but I know in reality it doesn't actually help, and besides, I'm here and the duvet is at home. And no to be honest as much as they're appreciated a bunch of comments full of hugs and platitudes doesn't really help much either, and just makes me more cross at myself for whining. I just don't know what to do instead though.

Weekly weigh in

This week I lost 3lb, which managed to be a bit of a surprise despite me having been good all week. Dunno if some of it is just from not having eaten much today though, we'll see. With the exception of Friday's dinner out which I'm not counting at all I intend to be good next week too. I'm not back where I first reach in mid-November, rather than mid-October which is where I was last week, so that's definitely rather cheering.

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